Tuesday, January 16, 2001

Today I woke up and I just couldn't get started. I'm really tired and I want to talk to my friends . . . I fel like talking about stories and ideas for pictures or whatever. My pic for Serena sucks so far. Angel looks like a tard. Sometimes I don't even know why I bother. Then again, certain people do appriciate my talent, while others envy me. I don't know why they do that, I never did a thing to them. Sometimes I consider quitting everything just so I'll fit in. I hate being different.

Every one always makes me feel out of place and strange... like I don't belong. And I guess I don't.

Everybody thinks that because I'm in this Art School, this drawing makes me a show-off. I can't help I'm good at something. They always want me to draw, or write a poem, or whatever. I really don't like it. They make me feel inferior, like I'm not good enough. People don't think about the way I feel, or anything. They think I'm just an artist . . . but there's alot more to me than just that.

It's one year today. I miss him so much . . .I didn't even get to say goodbye. He left me. I hope he's happy, where he is now. I also hope he knows that we miss and love him . . . I want him to come back. :*(